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Letter doesn't fly

In your March 29 issue, a reader lamented the cruelty that went into the production of foie gras ("Cruel food," Back Talk). However, what Ms. Bradshaw failed to take into account was the fact that geese are, by their very nature, vicious beasts who would not hesitate to devour the human race given half a chance. The brain of a goose is a disturbing thing, and the savvy foie gras professionals single out only the most criminally-minded birds for the procedure.

It is said that before the development of the foie gras process, gangs of rebel geese would terrorize the French countryside, destroying buildings and stealing small children to line their nests. It was a dark era indeed, and it could happen again.

Only the brave liver farmers stand between us and a total goose apocalypse. I would perhaps call into question the motives behind Ms. Bradshaw's protest; while I hesitate to suggest that she is, herself, a goose, it is not difficult to imagine her as a puppet of the goose regime. And I, for one, won't stand for it.

Yours faithfully,

John Brodrick Jones


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