From way up here, it's hard enough to tell what your governor does. Now we hear that there's also a lieutenant governor, and a lot of candidates to be the next lieutenant governor. What's that about?
Lieutenant governor is actually the best job there is. It pays six figures ($109,279) and there are hardly any duties at all ("lieutenant" is from a pair of French words meaning "in place of" and "holder"—thus, you are paid to be a placeholder). Your real gig is figuring out how to get on TV and show folks that you are the perfect person to be their next governor. Since 2001, Beverly Perdue has been our lieutenant governor, and her performance in office has been excellent—as shown by her lead in the polls for governor in '08. So her seat will be open, and our progressive friends think that if they're ever going to elect one of their own to high office in North Carolina, this is their chance. Among the early candidates, some progressives prefer Winston-Salem Councilman Dan Besse, others like Canton Mayor Pat Smathers or Hampton Dellinger, a Durham attorney. Zork, you strike me as a progressive-minded, uh, fellow (?) ... so anyway, keep your interplanetary lens on those three.